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Naija Chronicle by Oribhabor

Mi Aan mai Frends (2)

bai Edwin Eriata Oribhabor, Naija Langwej Promoter, Abuja-Naijiria

Mai Frend: Afta wi yan finish di oda taim, somtin jos de ron-ron fo mai hed. A stil de tink wetin fit kari mi komot kom Abuja. A neva si enitin at ol. Laif tu kost fo Abuja. Hau una tek de manej fo dia sef? Pesin go rent won chikini haus wen bi laik bois-kwota fo 500 tausand naira. Won smol kona-kona haus fo 300 tausand. Evritin na tau-tau, tau, tau. Landlord and agent no get sori ai fo enibodi. Dem no de ivun alau pesin drink wota drop kop. Evridé ol of dem wen get govanment go de poshu pipul wen de sel fo kona of rod. Fo Abuja, na evride pesin go de si Ben Johnson ron-ron. If yu ask mi hau a tek nou, a go tel yu won taim se, wi de si am fo niuspepa and telivishon. No bi mi and una fo una Abuja. Dis una Abuja. Hmmm!

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Wi go yan fo Intanet

bai Edwin Eriata Oribhabor, Naija Langwej Promoter, Abuja-Naijiria

The title of this piece could be captioned variously as: ‘‘Wi go tok fo intanet,’’ ‘‘Wi go rap fo intanet,’’ ‘‘Wi go jam fo intanet’,’ ‘‘Wi go blok fo intanet,’’ etc. The key words in the foregoing are ‘‘Tok,’’ ‘‘Rap,’’ ‘’Jam’’ and ‘‘Blok.’’ To tok oo rap fo intanet means; to talk (tok) / speak with (someone) online. To jam or blok fo intanet means; to meet with (someone) online. Therefore, wi go yan fo intanet simply means; we shall meet/speak online (in reference to someone else) In Naija, the word internet (intanet) is largely used in place of online. Pesin fit de fo intanet, pesin fit get intanet, pesin fit du intanet, ol na online. The reader who is not familiar with Naija ‘‘yans’’ is intentionally being exposed to some slangs/phrases that are similar in meanings, etc just like in other languages. Mek wi tok ebaut intanet. Let’s talk about the internet.

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"Dis man of God sef" - 1

bai Edwin Eriata Oribhabor, Naija Langwej Promoter, Abuja-Naijiria

"Man of God – (MOG)" is a popular coinage in Nigeria. Like most coinages in this country, it is difficult to say who was behind it. However, there’s no gainsaying the fact that without being in the spirit, it will be difficult to be blessed with the ingenuity of creating a piece of a religious epithet like this. This leaves me with a strong feeling that the concerned must have dug deep into the "world of the spirits" to arrive at it. Whenever one hears it, one is wont to take a ride into the realm of spiritual imaginations that may combine to condition one into reasoning in error that man’s abilities are comparable to that of God the Almighty, the Omnipresent and Omnipotent. You tend to imagine that Man could play God. On coming in contact with any one so addressed, you are most likely going to say to yourself; so this is the Man of God? You are tempted to want to touch his apparel, suit or agbada to have the blessings of His Majesty, di du-wa an du-wi, the agbadagbururu of di whole universe. You are revved up; "Man of God"; the first amongst equals? No! The one above all mortals? Yes! The representative of God Almighty? Yes! Whoever underrates him does so at his/her own peril, one speaks in the inside.

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HU BI POLITICHAN FO NAIJA?

bai Edwin Eriata Oribhabor, Naija Langwej Promoter, Abuja-Naijiria

Politiks na pawa!
Naija politiks na wa!
Na papa an pikin mata
Na dem get wi kontri pas
Politiks na honi fo Naija…

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As we selebet ’’World Mother Tongue Day’’

bai Edwin Eriata Oribhabor, Naija Langwej Promoter, Abuja-Naijiria

As Naija de rol, plenti pipul no de send egen fo wetin konsain tins ebaut ‘’current affairs.’’ In doz déz, if pesin no sabi ‘‘current affairs’’ na im bi se di pesin no ‘’current’’ at ol. An na wen pesin ‘‘current’’ na im pesin bi pesin. Fo dat taim, nobodi send fo hau mosh moni de fo yo poket. Wetin pipul laik to nou, na hau yo hed de wok. Na hau yu ‘‘current’’ rich na im dem go tek ‘‘rate’’ yu. Nauadés, evribodi de fait fo im poket. Evribodi de hozul fo im bele. Fo exampul, if yu ask ten pipul fo Naija todé wetin bi ‘‘World Mother Tongue Day,’’ i no go izi to faind won pesin we sabi am. Na so di tin bi fo difren tins fo dis levul.

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Yo kontri na yo kontri?

bai Edwin Eriata Oribhabor, Naija Langwej Promoter, Abuja-Naijiria

Despite glaring political and economic challenges in Africa, people like Nana Yaa Asantewaa, an African American in the US Virgin Islands, Caribbean, is tirelessly working in concert with many others, to ensure that African-Americans worldwide, embrace her Back-to-Africa campaigns. Her adopted name has its roots in Ghana where most of her activities have largely taken place. She is spending so much of her personal resources in taking up spaces in international online newspapers and magazines showcasing and promoting the sights and sounds of Africa including Nigeria. Every day, she tells our Brothas and Sisthas in the Diaspora that the continent of Africa is not all about evil and backwardness as commonly painted in the Western media.

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Dem se ais fish de "suck blood"

bai Edwin Eriata Oribhabor, Naija Langwej Promoter, Abuja-Naijiria

The writer draws his inspiration from all sorts of things and circumstances. The mere encounter with a scene, the innocuous remark/side-comment made by someone else etc, could trigger a writer into an outpouring of lines that ultimately baffles any reader. With mind made on a subject matter, a writer may change to writing on an issue that is completely different from what was originally intentioned. He may, if he wishes, reach out to both worlds without bringing them to a meeting point. Also, he may weave his lines in such a way that a capture of both the original subject and the one that suddenly overwhelmed him was achieved at a confluence. Only yesterday, the world marked or celebrated St. Valentine’s Day. Was it really necessary? If yes, how much of the history of St. Valentine do the celebrants know? These questions and many more gingered in my mind as thoughts of the popular Nigerian ‘‘iced-fish’’ entered a flow of thoughts. How possible is it to celebrate without a touch of fish? What about a gift of ‘‘iced-fish’’ as a way of appreciating someone on a Valentine’s Day?

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